rather i be a wild crow
to see all the sights in the world
than to be a caged bird
nvr to realise the vastness of this beautiful world

the days of glory tat awaits
yet left with only an empty shell to enjoy

forgive me for being afraid to fall
and for loving freedom
forgive me for holdin on to my obsessions

to abandon all dreams and hopes
aint nobody tat cannot do that
still myself standin out
im not afraid if ure by my side
even if its only me and ya

summer in ur hands
the phone ringin incessantly
leavin it be in a corner
not wantin to break the moment

seems like a break for me
away from the hustle
a change of scenery for the heavy-hearted
before it starts all over again

naively brave
venturin deep in the lonely nights
promises and memories
we're more than just five hundred days

when summer is over
wad shall become of us

him her and them

the story of him and her
and the stories of them and them
things i dun wish to know
whos wrong and whos right
and whom tat had let who down
i dun tink theres any wrong nor right
only what the heart feels

too late for regrets
i could see i love ya
its hurts me deep in my heart
still somewhere in my heart
seein u hurt
but its my heart tats hurt the most
i could nvr be like ya
to forget and forgone

the pain i'll forget
if only to see ya happy once again
a new love tat will grow
the past.forever etched in my heart

i wanna cheer ya up when u frown
hold ya up when ure down
wanna be around
nvr gonna let ya down

half the world away
footsteps set in the snow
looks alot like goodbye
i could nvr know
wads goin within of ur mind

still myself
nvr changed abit
still myself
in love with ya still

negativity

a million feelins across the mind
a million emotions tat can only be mine
mixed and clouded
castin a shadow of a doubt upon my ownself
upon the light shinin unto me
feelin the judgement of myself towards everyone else
a depressin feelin to bring along to sleep
like the negativity of a subtraction sign
till two of a similar become one
to a positive then shall us become

wad if i was the one by ur side
wad if i was the one tat read ur mind
wad if i was the one to say those words to ya
wad ifs and wad would had been
a single chance which will nvr happen
to cherish a single shared moment with ya

heaven knows

heaven knows how much i would give to be with ya
and to be by ur side
i used to believe
the way as i had remember
wants to talk to ya but ure nvr around when it matters
the time seems like forever
when u and i are away from each other
october.november.december
markin them down on the calendar

gone are the days of summer
settin in the time of winter
heaven knows how much i loved ya

a closure of a chapter
yet still stuck among the pages
wadever comes will go
wadever goes will never return
a change tat i can understand
wads between us need not be said more
a cliff hanger endin
cuz we never said a proper goodbye
wad nvr started could nvr be ended

goin back to a world only i know
seems like a step into a few years back
where day and nite doesnt matters
when day and nite blurs
when day and nite makes no diiference
when the only thing tat matters in the world was ya

if i was transient like a flower
i'll bloom right by ur side
and as i watch ya smile
i'll fade into oblivion
quietly into my world of sub zero

and i'll keep every memory of ya
away in a shoebox
a box of love
a box of memories
each one an unique experience
over the years i keep
over the years i remember
u are wad u are to me still
haven changed
not for abit
not for awhile
if u ever still remembered a card tat u wrote
i'll tell ya tat all tats inside
im workin hard to make it true one day
and when tat day
it'll be like the exact same
where u'll be the first
to see wad we can have together

under the apple tree
hand in hand
watchin every sunrise and set
till we both grow old
when our hair shall turn white with time
its only our love tat stays gold

startin a day
awaitin the end of another
when this aint over by a long shot
blowin hot and cold
a day like this
and im standin still like the weather doesnt matter at all
an expired promise
no longer clear bout such feelins
the movies
the books and the music
in control no more
too much rules and philosophies
happiness onli happens after sadness
and not to mention the temptation to scream
can it be easier
cuz it only seems to keep on goin back
it all falls apart

i dun think its fair
to keep on givin
i dun think its right
to keep on doin

its good to let things off ur chest
only if u had someone to talk to
its good to let out ur feelins
only if u had someone to pour out to

along the way we lost ourselves
within ourselves we lost our way
im still here
till the break of day
memories fade away
when time ceased to stay

im standin in the dust tat ure kickin
the trail of ur globe-trottin
lookin at the space tat im dreamin
wonderin if its u tat im seein
one too many times im thinkin
and im ponderin on wads goin on
like this dreamin was wrong

twelve hours

nothin could have hurt more than this
waited for ya till the middle of the night
till the lights have all went out

so many feelins unable to put to words
unable to express the deepest emotions
and i know the one by ur side will not be me
and i know the one for ya will not be me
watchin ya.slowly forgettin
silence much treasured

watchin ya in the arms of another
if only to happen over again
a tad too pitiful
ur tears ruinin ur mascara
as u said to me

two am wide awake in the mornin
three am when loneliness is callin
four and ure in the other half of the word barely wakin
five in my world im barely sleepin
six feelin refuses to go away
seven till the end of the day im countin
eight and im back to missin
nine am in my head ure all tat i am tinkin
ten its no one else but ya im rememberin
eleven if only to see ya again
twelve am and wad a fool i've been

addiction an unhealthy obsession
remember us as we used to be
breathe u in to stay alive
and its one more second to be with ya
tastin the sunshine and the apple tree
till we both grow old
love's still gold

lazin upon the open patch
breathin the scent of urs in the air
caressin thru ur hair
holdin u near
sweeter than anythin else
i love ya and this time its for real

outta nothin at all

and i tink tat i'll be able to get used to livin alone
and i believe tat i can still go on without u by my side
love is a dream tat i overslept

to start all over again
if only to see u once again
only to live one more day with ya
and wad would be left after tat day

i sleep at five
countin the hours to one
from left to right
when everythin seems so wrong
if only i knew the words to say
if only i knew just how to touch u
i would have told ya everythin tat i've gotta tell u
i would have made u mine
nvr would had let u fell
i can only follow for its the only thing i know
and i know im nothin till i give my everythin to ya

outta nothin at all

i'll be ur teddy bear
to let u hold deep into the nite
and then i'll slowly leave
quietly without a trace
if u ever so insist
not stayin a moment longer than needed
watchin ya from the sides
when one metre seems like a million light years
a world apart in that one metre

if there is a choice to smile
we would not have to cry
leadin right up to this moment
givin up everythin
leavin each and every familiar places
and we wouldnt care bout forever
farewell in the middle of the night
leavin me in the dreams

let me hold ya for one more minute
wad is there of us after tat one minute

walked past ur door
and u dun live there anymore
months like years passed by
and i noe
the reasons tat were given
the reasons tat we had learned to accept

and i told u how sad i would be
if u were to ever forget me

and i wil be waitin
and i will be willin
to take the fall from grace for ya when u fall

still very much in love with one another
juz no way in together

a little more and u'll touch the sky
the garden of angels tat awaits

its juz u
the same old one tat i knew
ur traits and ur habits
ur loves and ur hate
i loved ya.i loved ya
stop breathin
i dun see u anymore
and i dreamt
and i keep dreamin

sweetness of a dream
all within the solace of ur arms
misunderstandins tat causes rifts
when the both of us begins to drift
and love does not heal all wounds

i love the way i waste my life
i love the way i waste my time
u noe it aint wasted cuz its spent waitin for ya

lettin go doesnt seem so easy
neither a choice to go forward nor backwards
buryin it under them all
hopin to forget when time passes by
like u always do
like u always do
still like the one i knew

u noe im still waitin

cried all nite till there was no tears left
leavin u an emotion wreck
takin it hard the way u would
a broken heap on the floor
wad else can u do with a sentimental heart
old habits die hard
u wanna love no more
u wanna run no more
u wanna care no more
u juz wanna start all over again
takin back everythin tat u've gave
u dun wanna wander anymore
u dun wanna kiss anymore
the hardest part is yet to come

but if ure willin to let me
u wun walk this world alone

u noe i still love and it will nvr change
push me away
u noe wad im sayin
wun change my feelins
cant be happy away from ur side
cant have anyone but ya
no one as special as ya
like no other

u and i are the same
as stuborn as can be

push me away

many things i hide within
all the emotions and feelins deep within
words unspeakable to the mouth
never wearin wad is on my mind
never to bare my true feelins
unwillin and findin it hard
rather i hold them to myself
than to let the very precious u worry
i cant find it to be honest with myself
cant bring myself to
lettin go in a way u'll nvr contrive to comprehend
in my very own way
encryptin.hidin them among words and sentences
memories are wad they are to me
holdin them cherished

life isnt perfect without seein ya
cant have anyone but ya

hate is not a reason

theres no need to be suprised
theres no need to be sad
a person alone livin thru all the sorrows
walkin past every single person
lettin go
lettin go of my hand
no matter how he treats u
no matter how much he lets u go
no matter how life treats u
juz one person all alone

hate is not a reason

theres no need to understand me on purpose
i'm juz one person
one person alone
theres no need to know me fully
i'm nothin but one

small little words tat made u happy
small little things tat could do no harm
little stuff tat warms ur heart
its hope tat ur sunshine brings
and i was
and i always will

till the day tat we meet again
goin on our seperate ways for now
it wasnt too long ago
when fate dealt reality
angels tat fall without wings
but they are still angels
angels tat fall
losin their devotion
without faith and are they the same
paper heart
ure much stronger than me
the joy is a present
the hurt even better
doesnt matter tonight
it doesnt repeat anyway

everlastin forever
till eternity.the end of time and whatever is left from there
the sands of time breakin down
and ur clock stops runnin
wad is left at the end
wad can u take away with u when u die
and is tat the end
is there no one else
nvr been so many
nvr been so alone

maybe i'll walk this alone
not to fall in love so easily again
maybe i'll meet someone else new
one may be good
one may be bad but the choice is mine
one is mine and one is urs
and the choice is mine
random people
random choice
random love

in the dark of this half of the world
ure in the other half ready to start ur day
and whos the fool awake thru the nite
a million strangers and theres always someone else new for ya

are u lovin someone else
are u tinkin of someone else
are u with someone else
too many things im not willin to say
are u tearin
are u in pain
the red of the rose
the same red tat ur heart bleeds
to the final pages of the book

to find urself a better place
on the highway on eighty
tat was how i was reminded of the past
and everybody knows it
and tat was how the idea was stick into my head
and how would i had known
it seems like it was never here before
like all the lies

its only right for u to play the way tat u feel it
listen to the sound of ur heartbeat
dreams of loneliness tat drives u mad
so u always hold on to whoever tat pass u by
in the stillness of rememberin wad u had and wad u lost
i see the crystal vision and i keep them to myself

though i know its foolish
and deep inside i know
still i wait on endlessly
holdin onto the silly faith tat u'll come
tat phone tat never rang
forgotten in the corner of those pockets
luggin on the burden of the dreams
responsibility weighin me down
wearin me out
tearin me up
disappearin in a desperate bid to forget
a moonless night and ure the fire and light
holdin on if only to see ur face once again

random thoughts and random words
pieced together to form the most beautiful of lines
cuz ive promised tat u'll be the first

a time when one plus one no longers adds to 2
a mutiplier of desires
run to the places where i can be
run to the moments to set me free

gone before ur time
and goodbye it really was
emotions beyond words to hear tat u were gone
how could tat be
havin just stepped into the prime of ur life
the time of ur life
and now ure back to rest my fren
nothin could set this fact in still
the harsh side of reality tat hits hard
goodbye my fren
goodbye

do u like the things

in wad was only yesterday
memories of another world so faraway
here i am stuck in the cold
cuttin a lone figure across the world
soakin rain not helpin much too
the elements and the turbulent times ahead
too faraway
too faraway
tats why u go away
i noe
i noe
ur answers will nvr reach
all we do is take
all we ever do is take

unbearable
nothin beats this one kinda feelin
watchin u abandon all the words u said
unable to close this cruel pair of eyes
as i walked away in pain
comin to a rash decision where we will live to regret
drownin ur life in tears
months tat passed where u've moved on to another
stumbled back upon the words
words tat brought u to tears
made u wanna turn back time and left u askin why
the love tat was infront of u tat u can never see

i dun mind the weather
i got snow cap.gloves and sweaters
but anyway the hardest part is yet to come
i tink tat its senseless to keep on insistin
hopin for miracles to happen
perseverin on will juz seem futile
but anyway the hardest part is yet to come
i dun mind the trouble
i've got myself to count upon
the hardest part is yet to come
but i wun be walkin across this
alone

even if im good
it will all be grey
even if i made it
it will all imply
soakin thru and thru

stickin with u still
all my frens around me say u'll be gone too soon
but im gonna let them see we'll find our way back home
rain juz keeps on fallin when ure not around
i'll be tinkin of u
never gonna let u go
always and this one word will suffice

holdin on still
u had me cravin for more
i could nvr get enough
lovin u is all i ever wanna do
everythin i do is meant for lovin u
no one else can make me feel the colors tat u bring.gal

do u noe where ure goin to
do u like the things tat life is showin u
how sad the answers to the questions can be

rememberin seems so painful
when ur memories u carry is such a heavy burden
forgettin seems the easy way out
when all is lost and outta sight
losin touch and disappearin
is this how we disappear
is this how we should disintegrate

nothin is more painful
than the sights tats been flashed across repeatedly
as a lone figure cuts across the dark corner of the hall
all the sights in this city so foreign
i'll always be afraid

i'll be leavin
fadin away from the time of ur life
away from the pieces of ur memories
discarded and forgotten
but it doesnt really matter to me
as long as ure happy

i'll be lookin from afar
in a corner u'll nvr notice

change is hard

comin to grips with reality
the present self tat i am now
slowly reassertin in this time and place
same old sights and same old place
the onli thing is me tat changed
a long time ago when everythin was fine
so different.so different now
every bad times has its silver linin
mine was ya back then
times have changed and change is hard
in this world
in this heart
every different stage of life
every other different faces
each another story
many a dream i would like to sell
to take away the hurt of each dream

pain way too painful

takin things hard and it hurts so much
another point of view
another perspective
another way
another happy endin and i'll be alive

its time like this tat i hate myself
things tat are juz outta my own hands

2yrs ago and it would have been perfect
was stupid.was blind
was the biggest fool not to realise anythin at all
the emotions in the atmosphere of u and me
the skyline a perfect hue
untouched.pure and gold
silence was most treasured
decibels tat broke thru the serene surreal
puttin on the music in an attempt to cut off the blues
overwhelmin pain tats hidden
cuz i juz had too much things unsaid to u

dun pretend u can forget bout me
another casualty of normality
dun count on me to conform
nvr to fall in line
nothin is wasted.onli regretted
always a chillin rain
soakin pain
the start of the end roll
even if i dun understand
i still remember faithfully without fail
the leaves drop like the way im missin
salvagin before the set in
till they hit the ground
all i ever wanted was to stay by ur side a longer while

everytime i walk
take away my lone dignity
not afraid to lose it all
gamblin my happiness away
all or nothin such are the stakes
u'll take away my everythin everytime u leave
ur back view seen one too many times
closed my eyes as it fades from view
in my head all i ever saw
the few last words tat i heard
the notarnal tunes tat breaks ur heart everytime u hear
no matter how long it has been for u
i write for old memories sake
the heart tat beats only for u
all stale and cold within

until the day we die
in a pool of blood
i mean it
i mean this
we'll make the same mistakes
i'll take the fall for ya till blood soaks my shirt
nvr fall apart yet this hurts so much

the room keys borrowed.used and returned
just like ur hands
enough of my uselessness
takin away my life but learnin to smile again
forehead kissed.warmed.slowly losin warmth
cold.over.used to this kinda heartbeat
finally understandin happiness was nvr lackin
forget it
forget it
enough.more than satisfied
loved.kissed.
juz like holdin ur hands

too painful a mistake
too painful a lesson
a world of fools tryin to break us down
and u may not feel tat i care for u
keep me warm in ur love and u softly leave

if only u could see the way she is
u would understand why i feel this way
and what i muz do bout this love
if onli u could see her beautiful eyes when she says
when she says i love u
u would noe how much i would do for her

one too many bad day tat i gotten used to livin
freedom tat goes up in flames
tats the only way when everythins so wrong

dunno how i can make it all up to u
after all the hurt ive put u thru
and all the times i caused u pain
i dun tink i can ever repay
not even with this stupid life of mine

empty.they float thru my hands
my identity.has it been taken
gimme the strength i need
the strength to keep on goin
life would haf been better off dead
at least nobody would be sad
so much so for all the things done and said
takin it no more

and so as we

set my heart at ease
clenchin a fist
fightin the wind
closed my eyes to feel with the heart

cuz she reminds me of u
down to the little small things tat u'd like to do
and i noe this time its really goodbye
as i raised my hands to reach for the sky
ive always been true
ive waited so long
its been far too long in all tat we do
closer to heaven with u
seems tat ure cold in love
the past tense could not come in time to start all over again
walkin at a pace where only u can walk alone
its not like i can understand
lest even speak and so as we go
and so as i write

dun wanna be the one

sentimental is wad u chose to believe
stories tat were built to deceive
at the end was a light at the top of the staircase
the light peepin thru the ajar door
in and out right and wrong
hot and cold the other moment
sing me a song
long enough to accomodate all ur love
do u realli wanna grow old
do u realli wanna turn cold

deja vu.memories of u in my dreams
betrayal.scenes of the unforgivable
fantansies.eyes wide open starin hard
more and more dreams
explain them to me
playin with my mind
seein things the way i am
everytime i see ur face at all
locked in a room of regrets
strugglin is fultile
without directions towards eternity
lost towards forever
a love tats so heavy
a story unfinished in tat yr to continue on to the end
will u return all tat uve taken away with a smile

i dun wanna be the one to do the same old things all over again
the same mundane things tat we both do
cravin for excitment and thrills
not the times spent missin ya
i dun wanna be the one left alone at the end when ure all too faraway
i dun.baby. i dun
the world will not fall apart without u
i dun wanna be the one to be kept waitin forever
not gonna be the fool for ya
waitin for a thing tat can nvr happen
not this way.not anymore
lovin does not mean onli u
its time to go against the flow
away from one another
in opposite directions i shall walk from ya
till the day we meet once again

we'll be halfway round the world if we walked long enough

the saddest of blues
the heart wrenchin tunes
brings a drop of tear to ur eyes
as the warmth from ur hand fades
enough to drain the life from my body
if only to learn to smile again
tokens of love tat got lost along the way
happiness was nvr abandoned
the rain tat washes both u and me clean
loved.kissed.used.discarded
too used to the tempo of ur heartbeat
wanderin without a sense of belongin
a set of love of two for sale

memorial address

at the end of time
back down along memory lane
theres pictures pasted on the walls
posters of so many yesterdays
the highlight of the year
the soundtrack of the year playin from station to station
the headlines pasted all over the bulletins
with the cold chill as companion

guess im outta time
the lines blurred
and i can no longer be affirmative
if u were a fren or a love tat passed me by

u taught me love.sorrows.life
u made me feel.had a dream
changed everythin bout me
i nvr cherished
i nvr did
i nvr learnt
i nvr will haf another chance to
i knew how to let go
but i nvr knew how to forget
i will nvr love tat much again
not with anyone else but u
havin more and more dreams
fantasies or realities with eyes wide open
juz tell me who u are

words of the past
wounds of the present
we held hands sayin to walk till the end
let time tell the truth
both of us afraid to hear the answer
we took for granted wad was ahead of us
why muz it come to this
perhaps u dun haf an answer too
seein another piece of sky within the realm of ur eyes
can it be tat we muz haf such opposite dreams
we promised still
to walk each other to the end
hand in hand