beyond these walls

go and shut me out
close the doors
held in ur arms like a stranger
its time to go
beyond these walls
now pls dun say a word
i am standin here alone
and wun u be with me
i'll observe u from afar
leave me in a swirl
everytime i see u
an illusion or a dream
standin in the dark
and will u be with me

wantin to fall asleep
yet unable to
its juz another one of those days
leave me an empty shell
longin for a soul
wantin to fall in love
yet not havin the courage to
its juz another way to run

a mothers pride and joy
a woman's charm and beauty
a man pride and honour
a father joy and love
an apple of their eyes
a dead man silence and peace
everythin so surreal
a serene state of mind
the king of hearts honour
an elaborate plan
an unbelievable story
foreseen by the quiet fortune teller
dark clouds and neon lights so faraway
sittin alone in a corner
a shiftin existence and i cease to believe
water flowers kicked up by rollin wheels
every drop so intricate

tearin and smilin at the same time
mixed emotions tat run thru the sides of the face
a complicated potrait

a stolen glance

a meetin by chance
with u takin a stolen glance
lookin straight into my eyes
i could onli manage a weak smile
stealin another glance
as we bade goodbye
partin our ways
on this christmas day

i miss u
from the bottom of my heart
i realli do
i cease to exist
when i cease to believe
i cease to exist
when i cease to resist

nothin can stop the emotions
tat run down the sides of ur face

cuz i'll be holdin on tonite

theres a feelin in my mind
tat i wanted to noe
words could nvr descibe all the things inside
wads there left to say
when things are better if u stayed
and if we carry on this way
things are better if i stay
once there was a time
u hear me
with u near me
pretend to leave and meet again
when our worlds collide
wads the worst thing to take
with every heart u break
so long and goodnight
so long not goodnight
cuz i'll be holdin on tonight

is it a crime
to be thinkin of ya
wrong place at the wrong time
so wrong
so wrong

empty blanks

the hair color fades
like the colors of u
slowly fadin away from the times of my life
showin signs of hesitance
as the atmosphere became awkward
starin into blanks
like we always do
we make the same mistakes
i'll take the fall for ya
so why does this hurt so much

stuck in ur tots

stuck in ur tots
and u'll be bitin ur nails
stuck in a moment
and ure tappin the cup
lost in ur charm
and im head over heels
lost in ur embrance
and im cravin for more

draw a circle

i drew a circle and kept myself in
an empty room
an empty void
a blank somewhere in the lines
disappearing into emptiness
swallowed whole

the sands of time tat left me behind
while everybody around me moved forward
wastin time upon the past
open wounds

a love tat needs not be compatible
a love tat needs no approval from others

silent love

would u believe if i told u the truth
or would u rather hear all the lies tat i made up
if i told u all the made believe
will u still believe my lies

the rain pours hard upon the window
cloudin up my mind
but maybe its not so bad after all
soaked thru and thru
wakin up to the pouring rain
and it makes me wonder why i got out of my daze at all
the movin sights outta the window
passin by ur left side again
starin into blanks
how are u to understand my silence
when all the love and hurt are unspeakable
one too many times before we cried
seekin to fulfil the prophecy juz for ya
a process of love tat kills the soul
and ur leavin tat leaves my heart in pain
take me away
take me away
chasin after a shootin star
the onli end is to crash and burn
closin my eyes to sense the feelins
from the head to the heart
in the corner of the city where lonely hearts meet
in the middle of the nite exchangin loneliness
without words to say
sittin behind and u remain silent
a way of interaction
how am i to understand ur silent love

the pourin rain hit upon the window
the movin sights outside
i cant see at all
and it makes me wonder why
i got out of my daze at all

hate loving

i was silent
and u din had much to say
we overlooked where happiness was
and u muz haf cried
somewhere in a corner of ur heart
ur eyes were red from cryin
and it hurts to see u cry
heaven noes how much pain i'm in
too much hate
for theres too much love
save u and me
before we all fall too deeply

in the silence i believe in

strangely familiar
familiarly strange
always
a word on my mind
lyin here lookin at an old photograph
a love song the way it was meant to be
words u have been needin to hear
if i could
i would
even if i couldnt
i'll still would

still so much to say between us
fallin to pieces
fallin into place
killin the pain tats spinnin in the silence
losin some sleep tonight
in this moment we are silent
as we learn
slowly losin our innocence
one last look into ur eyes
and ive finally realised
it was those pair of eyes tat i fell in love with

in the silence i believe in
i can see u in the silence
u are silent
possessin all the beauty
hungry still for more
heaven holds a sense of wonder
in the silence i am free
can we still close our eyes and dream a little
juz like how we use to do baby
ur eyes tat captures innocence
waitin for u to kiss me tonight
leavin me the most beautiful of memories
waitin for u to come here into my dream
holdin u under the stars
till these black hair of ours turn silver
this time.i'm nvr lettin go of my hands

odd one out

grass without roots
i'll grow where i stand
im not conformin
im not wad they wan me to be
odd one out
i am myself

stay awhile and hear me out
and u wun haf to ever see my face again
ur broken dreams were mine too
and those tears tat u dropped
one too many times we teared
as hard for me to be here
so wun u stay awhile

name

wads in a name
forgettin my name
and who i realli am
will i be the same
can i exist
when i resist
i dun deny
when its all lies

ur left side

lyin here alone
on the bed i lie
and all i could ever hear
tat its too late to apologise
in my mind
a special feelin
nobody shall understand
and u wun notice
cuz its me tats too silent
a glimpse of forever
a moment of eternity
by ur left side
my right side

took a step
took a chance
i'll even took a shot for u

without u

everybodys changin
everythings gone
without u
without u

baby gal

u wun rest till five
u'll wake up at nine
baby gal ure so fine
someday i'll make u mine
baby gal u look like ice
baby gal i see myself in ur eyes
one last look added with ur smile
baby gal i love to see ur smile
in the mirror ure the bulls eye
turnin back for juz a little more while
baby gal u had me to smile
i left a piece of myself behind with u
my heart

stories and reasons

many stories
many reasons
doesnt matter now anyway
though i still rememeber a day
people i love
no longer matter
people tat loved
no longer exist
stood at doorways
waitin for u
stood at exits
waitin for u
this time
can no longer wait for eternity
used to be so important
everythin juz fades with time
many reasons
many excuses
people i once gave up
come back to my life
roads i once avoid
can i walk them back again
juz another day
juz another way
a point in life
i'm juz a little blemish alive
innocently stuborn
slowly forgotten
forgotten

golden bowl

memories fade
onli the photographs remain
sleep tight my miss pink panther
somebody holdin ya tonite
i can nvr live without u
tat was a pretence
everyone would wan u by their side
ure a star everybody covets
but all i ever wanted something simple
not wad u or them make it out to be
turned into a star and vanished
not even a chance to say goodbye
if the person u'd love left
love me then u said
but i'll lay down my life juz to look for her
a betrayal was not wad it meant to be
loneliness from all directions
beside u it was nvr evident
for it was all so natural
left ur side and it became all so obvious
a chance meeting
something nvr shld had happened
in love with an illusion
the person u knew was nvr the real me
we're done
its over
i dun even need to be loved
i juz wan u by my side
even if its all givin dreams
beautiful dreams
weavin each and every for everyone of all of u
cuz i'll come to regret and be left with nothing at the end
i juz wanna see ya once again
listen here
i love u here
with u but my heart with another
turnin to look at the sky
knowing tat u will onli shine on me
for i will onli shine for u
nvr tot it could happen
lifes like the oklahama dance mixer
holding hands
sayin its destiny
holdin another sayin the same thing again
october rain
and santa claus aint comin anytime soon

everyone covets

woke up to a sad dream
emotions i felt and the expressions tat u had on ur face
juz so real
it was juz so real
but even if its true
who am i to stop u in ur pursuit of happiness
u said u wanted to try to love again
i had to let u be
ure the star tat everyone covets
but all i ever wanted
a star tat shines onli for me
cuz i'll be a star tat shines
onli for her

randomly

nvr seem to get along
the onli one tat i got
my premonitions became real
vanishin alone to be a star
the sky kept cryin on a day
losin trust
losin fast
tonite
day and afternoon
and the mornin with u

shes electric

shes electric
a smile and a look into the eyes
a pout and a wink of the eyes
all she ever need
shes electric
i liked her fren
but i liked her even more
shes electric
can i be electric too

and we live among the fools
breakin us apart
when they all shld let us be
we belong to u and me

everywhere nowhere somewhere

wad shall become of me
life is dead
and i am wad they dun see
and theres all the things tat i dream
i stand at roads
wonderin which way to go
hopin time will pass soon
so tat i could die
as proud as the rose
tat blooms upon the battlefield
standin up
yet stranded
with no where to go
the things i did
will it allow me to rest upon here forever
in peace
in peace
takin away everythin
still holdin onto the beauty tats left

alone in the crowd
cryin too easily
too many tears
still a lost child
devoured by fears
people come and go
hidin in shadows
hidin in dreams
movin in and out
nothin but strangers
strange as it seem
a paper heart so easily torn
over and over again
the little pieces juz wun fit together again
nvr knew the reason why
and it nvr ends
an unrest in the air
time slips slowly but surely away
where can i go from here
everywhere.somewhere.nowhere
i looked upon the empty sky
somebody tell me why
take a chance
to take a stand
destiny awaitin
upon a runaway train
feelins so cold
colder than the rain tat fall upon my face
runnin away
everywhere
nowhere
somwhere.

count to 100

ur world too faraway
unable to understand
back to the start
but it feels like an end
most afraid
most afraid

close ur eyes
and make a count to 100
and i'll be there by ur side
i'll be the first u see
when u open ur eyes

waitin for u
im waitin for u
at the end

ice queen part 2

to see u once again
my ice queen
still u caught my eye
how could i ever forget
such a perfect sight
ur fringe still hidin those eyes of urs
cuz theres still aint no one like u
like no other
cuz i still remember u
and tat special jacket of urs
how could i ever forget
those colors so bright
to be onli able to see u at nite
ure still my midnite sun
ure the color
when everythin else fades to grey
u still hold the mystery tat u are
conveyin a conflict of emotions
sad yet happy
happy yet sad
ur sorrows i wish i could share
ur joy i wish i could add
and i noe ure lookin my way
cuz im lookin ur way
stuck in a moment
in a world of onli u and me
stay my gal stay
juz stay with me
till the break of day
cuz i still call u ice queen

if it hurts to remember
if it feels better to hate
rather u had not forgive me
the onli way to remain in ur tots
maybe i cant sing a love song
the way its meant to be
maybe im not as good as before
its still me
always

the streaks tat nvr go away
no matter wad u say
till death do us part
till death and still we nvr part

for love

no rights i haf to criticize their ways of life
when mine aint tat wonderful
no rights i haf to criticize them
when myself aint so complete
maybe i gotta hold on to wad ive got
it doesnt make anymore difference
if i made it anot
cuz ive dreamt of runnin away
but u whispered into my ears
tellin me its ok
sometimes i feel
im onli halfway there
sometimes i feel
im neither here or there
take my hand
take my hand
aint lookin for forgiveness
if i were to die
before my time
let this boy die like a man

ive met u before
and tats alot
for love
for love

4 liners

when the past has all but faded
leavin behind wad was onli the memories
the black and white
and the colors in the photographs

forget it
once and for all
lookin for answers in places where they nvr will be found
how dumb

another hour
another day
another year
how long more will i despair

happiness was always in abundance
why cant i keep some of them
never mind
as long as im contended

learnin to smile again
learnin to love again

empty

and ive tot u'll be moved
all my most beautiful lines juz for ya
but how could tat be
when u no longer care

time passes me by
wonderin how much more ive got left
too little and i'll be with regrets
too long and i'll be sickly
cuz ure too beautiful
afraid to say tat i love u
and i noe
if it was me instead of him
the smile on ur face would had slowly fade
love onli after the story has end

the city too fast
the city too bright
too much pain
too much tears
too many fears
and they said faith will bring love
i need a reason to believe
at the end
its still cold
and im gettin old
too fast or too slow
the past onli in the photographs
i dun dare to tink
i dun wanna tink
my mind wanders off
to places i nvr wanted to noe
neither here nor there
maybe the world still beautiful
juz tat i could not see it
maybe nothin haf changed
onli i had
maybe i was nvr me
maybe it was all a dream
a different feelin i had felt
a different dream tat i had dreamt
the little things tat nvr add up to enough
when i die
is tat the end
the hardest part of this was leavin u
i am nothin at all
i haf nothin at all
an empty shell
an empty soul
an empty nite
an empty room
an empty heart
an empty me

at the end
at the end
stoppin all my wrongs
wakin up
wakin up

life is precious

life is precious
life is short
life is wonderful
life is beautiful

the tears tat ure holdin back
or pain if its wad it is
dreams we had hoped for

edge of oblivion
dusted and dirted
remembering a day of importance
in the shadows
the middle of the nite
the end of a day
the start of another dawn
a moonless nite
an empty sky
dim stars and listless lamp posts
some love better off hidden
tears for fears or joy
leavin as the best option
lyin upon
gazin into the sky
head spinnin
one too many a drop
doin it again
maybe all little things will never be the same again
a lonely backdrop
reminiscing the past
wads love
wads life
wads human u
nable to understand
wanderin upon the nites

beauty
theres onli traces of them left
turnin back the pages
understandin the most beautiful lines
love havin reached the end
fingertips upon the keyboard
silent emotions

maybe silence is a crime
too used to feelin of degradin
hurtin myself with my own hands
happiness stops upon this dark nite
the familiar face in my dream
the dream tat i hold onto

takin role into reality
in too deep
too much emotions used
the city's cold
unable to feel any warmth
and i regret
not actin real enuff lovin u

world apart

forgive me for being silent
if i could not be with u
its not tat i dun wan to
a world apart
theres always disappointment
if happiness is short lived
dun let it be so good
love is onli love
onli able to turn into hatred
even for lovers

the eyes tat attracted my attention
doesnt equate to a duty to love
shadows in my life
hidin away from u
missing u
but theres nth i can do
comin from 2 different worlds
i can onli hope
fallen leaves and withered flowers
tryin to hold onto a piece of hope
if love would onli bring hurt
rather we had not met
onli wishin for a glimpse
is tat too much to ask for
when hurt come into play

love thesis

how do two strangers meet
unfamiliar right from the start
maybe loneliness plus loneliness is love
an interaction tat nvr was
tried and hurt
still they try
usin time as a balance
wad a word is love
fate and destiny equals to maybe
usin tears as a choice
standin at doors
throwin the keys away
wad was the past tense
wads now the present tense
the answer somewhere in our midst
memories were honesty
the past was not a blank
writin down the three words
i love u
on my hand and on my scribbles
givin up everythin
as long as ure happy

maybe u feel like cryin for smilin not an option for u
the street too silent
continue tinkin of him
till theres sunshine in ur heart
stuborness like urs
holdin onto him till the end
an endless hope
dunno whos the foolish one
maybe u would like to tear with me
pourin out ur sadness
the street still too silent
and ure holdin on still
standin silently by ur side
makes me sad too
maybe u would like to smile
when ur tears haf all dried
maybe then would u like to accompany for juz awhile more

a moment of romance

am i nvr goin to tell u all the things tat i wan to tell u

words unspoken as life nears
lookin for a voice of the past
leavin behind a moment of brilliance
as the dreams fade into emptiness
theres always an agony
lookin for answers in love
givin up everythin for the moment of romance

3hrs

love for 3 hrs
more than theirs for 30yrs
some things
havin was more than enuff
some ones
meetin was more than expected

already more than hoped for
already more than wad was there then
cuz i keep remindin myself
of wad i realli am

did u ever

did u noe
could u tell
u were the onli one
that i had ever loved
did u ever see me walkin by
did u ever wonder why

one week

hold onto me
the way u hold onto ur life
hold onto me
the way u hold onto ur loved

all we are
all tat we are
i mean this
and i mean it this time
pass me through
touchin hands as ure fallin down
the look in ur eyes
seems like i saw them elsewhere before

i've hoped to be happy
i've hoped for eternity

an exchange of loneliness
an interaction of silence
ur hands holdin tight

nobody in particular
payin no attention either
without any wish
smilin this world away
the stars and the moon
they light in ur eyes

i noe its all lies
i aint carin no more
hold onto me juz a little while more

is it ur heart i hear breakin in the lonely nite
we nvr knew how to reach out to each others heart
will we ever do
ur hand being held by another
u shldnt be holdin onto mine
ur heart longin for him
u shldnt be next to me
i shld haf gently let ur hands go
but i aint got the strength to do so

ur sweet scent

maybe if there wasnt her
u would haf be the one
so sorry i cant be ur superman

the wind blowin her sweer scent onto my face
at least i noe happiniess is not faraway
ur sweet scent
if onli i could keep juz a little
at least rememberin still the taste of happiness
u come close
lettin down my feelins again

all messed up

tot u were somethin different
and u juz came fallin apart
im not perfect
juz all messed up
nothin left to pretend
this is the end
this is my life
not like u needed anybody

ure so perfect
no one measures up
ure by urself
all messed up
and hes everythin im not
this is the end
this is my life

cuz i noe

cuz i noe
cuz i understand
tats why im feelin down
tats why im feelin inferior

cuz i noe
i will nvr be
wad he is to u
cuz i noe
i am onli
nothin more than a fren
cuz i noe
i was nvr
wad u realli wan

the little things in the eye

hold me
tighter than ever
i seem to see u on a restless nite

though the world will drown in blood one day
and we're all gonna die
let me forget the news
i dun wanna noe
but nobody noes where is the end
even if its all lies
but juz a little bit more
sing for me

keepin my achin heart away
the little things in my eyes i juz cant hold back
nvr understandin how to reach out to touch anothers heart

save me
for i haf an urge to tear greatly

hurts

a look into wad might had be
somethin tat will nvr be
nvr secondin
nvr interferin
standin by the sides
tats my gentleness for ya

cuz it hurts my heart to see u hurt
cuz it pains in me to see u down

in love with a gal i shld not love
yet im fallin head over heels

born to love
keep me in ur tots for i am weak without u
we were meant to be for so much more
always in my dreams

half half

its the image of u in my head tat wun let me go
tats why im holdin on
and till my guilt goes up in flames
to a bad day
i gotten used to spendin

half happy
half sad
neither here nor there
an emotion swirl within
ure everythin so wrong
im everythin so wrong
still my favorite mistake

and i finally knew how she felt back then
and i finally understood the reason why
and im no fool for ya anymore
till ur guilt puts u in shame
and i dun wanna tink bout it anymore
and maybe nothin last forever
and maybe even when we're so wrong
cuz i saw u walkin by
and i saw u cry

dyin in ur arms

tired of startin again somewhere new
cant change from wrong to right

holdin u by my side with every breath of mine
my sweetheart
help me keep the faith of mine
and ure the onli reason the nite aint growing cold
till the end of time
dyin in ur arms with u

closin my eyes and dream a little
and dreamin juz a little more

emptyin

i watch as the day fade away

i could onli watch

i stared at the sky and wish myself away

i could onli hope

i longed for a day to be so far away

i could onli wait

many things tat leave me empty

many words

so many people

things ive achieved leave me empty

when others would haf been so full of themselves

my mind is empty

my head is empty

i'm feelin empty

and i am lonely

feeling weak and so sick of myself

sick of this life

sick of it this time

this time i dun feel like makin it thru

this time i juz feel like givin up

i was so mistaken

i was so misplaced

i juz wanna keep on dreamin

this time dun wanna wake up anymore

but i'll stop dreaming if ure not in it anymore

too many memories tat this place holds

i dun wanna tink anymore

present

the class tat i nvr was in
as i flipped thru the dusty pages of life
still rememberin u
and the letter tat u wrote
a smile tat appeared on my face
i nvr noe why
juz the way tat i am in front of ya
and i finally understood
the present tat u said u'll give
the day u decided to walk away
maybe i'll be better without u
maybe i aint no better without u
we nvr gave love a try

forgettin seems the hardest way out
seperation is the present for me
and i saw her
tears in ur eyes
not goin near
juz watchin u silently

at least i still feel the pain
understandin the taste of life
forgiveness is the best way out for us
and we do not cry
love aint perfect
and its all my fault

nothin at all

nothin at all
nothin
mean nothin to me
nothin more to me
and i dun
and i wun
all tat of me

left
right
left
right
walkin in circles again
makin the same mistakes

oblivion

and i return to the darkness
and i return no more
in the depth of oblivion
as i exist no more

missin ya

a heavy rain tat washes me clean
made everything so clear
mistakes
mistaken
misunderstood
miss ya
i loved u cuz u loved me

nothing to hold onto
everything to regret

of blood and pain
we are the walking wounded
of blood and wounds
we are the guilty innocent
is it all too late
to want to hold u in my arms
to want to say i love u
to cherish u
forever not to part with ya

when ive forgotten my name and who i realli am
will i be closer or even more a stranger
and ure still beautiful in every way
listenin to ur breathing
and i doubt who u realli are
but never mind who u are
i love u the same
ure still the onli one tat can make my heart skip a beat
to set my pulse racing and my world spinning
the onli one i cant get outta my mind
i'll be waiting for ya by the sides of ur life
waiting for u.

pool of blood

hand in hand we fall
together in this pool of blood
lettin each other noe how much we mean
and in the pool of red
until the end of everythin
and we go cold
days fade to red
nights turn to red
makin the same mistakes as yet we do
my hands stained with ur blood
ur hands full of mine
we make the same mistakes

still believe

listening carefully to the sound of closing of doors
from grey skies to clear weather
many years it has been
from loneliness to freedom
still on rainy days
starin at blanks
listening to the windstill
a fool
still a fool

the world have already changed
but baby i still believe
and still believe rushin out onli to return home
empty no matter rain or shine
nobody feels for me anyway
they blindly run on
nvr knowing tiredness
a few more drinks tinkin i'll understand wad the answers are
no matter how sincere
nobody will get touched anyway
pure innocence left our world long ago
and they follow blindly
nvr knowing to tink

wrong for tinkin too much
wrong for havin nth at all
wrong for not understanding
wrong for not givin up
wrong for losin myself to the world
losin to myself at the end
who can ever forgive me
everything so wrong
might as well be wrong
till the end
with all i can

TTTTT

of lonely nites and empty streets
lonely roads and empty rooms
hand in hand we fall

till they tell the truth

if u could see me here this way
lookin back wads from today
stoned in love but not with u
if we could watch the past away
will we go our seperate ways
or do it all again
not tat i care

no need for much words
everything understood
an embrace says it al
la smile shows it all
i believe and believe
some pain onli our hearts noe
ure no longer the one im thinking of
and im no longer the one ure missing

nobody's child

aint no place for me
not a place in this world
i dun belong
i shld not even exist
nobody child
i'm nobody child
no reasons to stay
feelin lost and scared
to wander till i find a place i can call my own
a place i can call my home
a place tat accepts me
a place i can stay

tattered and broken
how easy it is to end a life
19yrs transcend in an instant
love me when im gone
strangers from the day i leave
alone but i'll be happy
familiarity could onli breeds contempt
turnin back could onli means sadness

everything so wrong
might as well be wrong till the end
and my family dun seem so familiar
im nobodys child still

nvr wanting to return home
till its late
wanderin around and around
cold and bitter
stuck in a situation
my solitude
my solitude
nobody understands how i used to cry in the middle of the nite
things tat i'll nvr tell
feelins tat i nvr dare admit
down and out
im torn
fuck this world tat had been unfair
fuck it all
nobody child
im nobodys child

ice queen

i wanna write the most beautiful piece for u

without any name
and totally forgetting who we were
still rememberin our short exchange
both our hearts will noe

i call u ice queen
fringe hiding tat sweet smile of urs
special in ur very own way
the more i see u the more beautiful u juz get
aint no one like u
like no other
i love it the way u are
in love with the way ya lookin at me
so shy yet so sure
mesmerised by the look in ur eyes
cant get u outta my mind
a gal like u so hard to find
been days
i'm so missin ur way
hey gal
i'm missin u
outta nothing at all
u're juz the special kinda gal ive been looking for

i call u midnight sun
the radiance shinin from ya in the depths of the nite
pure and innocent love

i call u my dearest
no matter where u are
no matter wad u'll do
u're still the most beautiful
even if i dunno u at all
lovin u all the same

i call u cute ah lian
cute ah boy love cute ah lian