i noe

i made a meal
and threw it up on thurs mornin
i really got alot of things to learn
said i would
and i'll be leavin one day
before my heart starts to hurt
and if u're leavin
will u take me with u
i'm tired of sleepin all alone
wad's the matter with me
i juz wanna sing somethin new
cuz i noe
the cold and wind and rain dun go
they onli seem to come and go away
times are hard when things haf got no meanin
i'm watchin tv on my own

i believe in it
i do believe in it
and i still believe in it
as my soul slides away
gonna start a revolution now
to take tat look off from their face
nothin's now gonna put my heart out

they say things will work out rite
they say this is onli temporary
it's not gonna last forever
they say it will be over soon
they say it will they say it definately will
who am i to believe in
so many trains of thoughts goin around
messin up everythin
my world clouded by darkness
livin in this cold dark space
the empty room
the closed door
the closed windows
my onli safe haven
i need a getaway place
i need to getaway
somewhere to hide somewhere
to find my peace
i gotta fight for my peace
how ironic things can be
i gotta abandon my humanity
to take up the rusty sword
all to fight for my peace
my love my hate my angst my pride
all of a seventeen yr old
is this really my fate
perhaps i've been wrong all the while
after all.i've nvr been smart
i nvr had anythin
everythin i stood for were onli lies
in the end i've lost to myself
i've lost to them
i've lost to the world
haf i been wrong all the while
wrong in tryin to fight fate
wrong in tryin to fight my life
wrong tat i nvr admit defeat
even when i'm tired
now then i've know
so tired tat i couldn't sleep
this i sure do noe
i hate this life
i hate the person tat i am now
i tried to overcome my fears
all the possibilities
wad if i ain't wad i really seems
wad if i can't make it at all
wad if...
wad if...
too many ifs in my mind
look at me
take a good look at me
wad do u see
wad did u saw in me
i'll make it different
i'll make the difference
remember my face
i'll fly high
i make sure of tat no matter wad
no matter how
i'll fly higher than anyone has went
i did not gif up hope back then
i nvr did
i nvr will

anyone will do

listen to the sound of my lonely heart
still thinkin bout the past
how things used to be
tryin hard to live alone
day by day
everythin juz comes to me when i'm lyin in my bed
late at nite i struggled alone
right now onli memories are left
how i need a different place to hide
it really seems to me
tat there's no light at the end of darkness
all the things can nvr be the same again
can things ever work out rite
always disappointed at the end of everythin
everytime i tried hard
i put my heart into everythin i do
wad did i get back in return
and there's no one round to hold my hand
anyone would do
juz pls.someone
lay me to sleep comfort me like the kid i am
i need to noe again the feelin of secure
it's so hard to make it on my own
even harder when everyone tryin to make a fool outta me
makin me out to be a clown to them
juz to entertain them
fuck them all
everybody juz likes to mess me up
fuck them all

fly boy

this small crazy boy
wans to fly
away from this place
he's walkin on the road alone
travellin strollin wanderin along
on the long dusty windy road
he wans to see the sights
tat he couldn't but in his dreams
the lights tat lit the way are blindin
there are many things tat he would like to noe
but he dunno how
but maybe
he'll be able to make it someday
cuz maybe
he'll noe how to make it
and after all
he's onli seventeen
in this place he found no reason to stay
with the colors slowly fadin away
he wans to smile
he wans to laugh
and he wans to fly

special

okie this one special
requested by laoda
here goes...
4.30am in the mornin...
2guys stopped their mitsubishi galant in front of where i was sittin(on a fountain)
they got off their car and walked towards me
i took a look at them
one of them stared at me
i was thinkin "are they lookin for a fight???"
then suddenely let's call him guy 1
guy 1:police
me: *thinkin*(are u sure?)
guy1:ic pls
me: okie
guy2:how come so late still dun wan go home
guy2 then woke laoda who was sleepin on the chair up
laoda was blur blur
guy1:ic pls
me and laoda then handed over my ic and laoda ez link
guy 2:wad's ur address
laoda:wan send letter ar???
laoda still blur dunno wad's goin on
guy 2 i think oso blur blur nvr heard wad laoda was sayin
laoda then finally woke up said his add
guy1:how come so late still dun wan go home
me:come out to talk talk lor
guy 1 then went off on his walkie talkie
guy 1came back
guy1:got record anot
me:nope
guy 2 then handed back our ic
they then went off

the kindness endowed upon

unknowingly a yr has past
it all seems so long ago
and i grown used to this shit
peace or pity
i dun care
it's none of my business
they say i'm crazy
i am crazy
i'm not really ok
but it doesn't matter to me at all
it's not my past
and it's nvr gonna bother me
regrets i'm without any
the truth hit me long ago
somehow i'm still emotional
attached to the kindness of an older generation
if not for it
i would haf break away long ago
it's the onli thing tat keeps me here
i juz dun haf the heart to turn away
it's etched deep within my heart
the kindness endowed upon