rainbow to the earth

changin world
changin times
everybody is changin
and i dunno why
so outta touch
unable to understand this life
the pain tat shows in ur eyes
those red swollen eyes
they speak for themselves
doors tat were opened.closed
faces tat smiled no longer do
nothin will hurt
turned away
walk the steps to faraway
to the place where the earth meets the rainbow
somewhere they'll be together forever
sit under the apple tree
watch the stars at nite
too many wrongs done in this life
too little to make it right
the flashbacks tat appears
times u broke down in front of the mirror
hope tat gets complicated
not tat i dun wanna believe
but the faith tat i lack
let the sleepless me be in ur dreams
wad do u see in my eyes
why do i feel so much like dead ends

2/14

time of the year again
once more i'm lyin here
alone in my own world
alone in this small space
writin to myself as usual
tryin to comfort myself
i wonder can i still make it on my own
i tried to open the door
wishin myself to be next to u
will u fall in love with me
if i sing tat song with all my heart
will u gif me one min of ur time
let me take a deep look at u
let me remember u
tat sweetest momemt of u will stay in my heart
but we're onli frens
i guess there'll nvr be me in ur heart
missin thinkin of u
onli leaves me with big eye bags
i wonder how long before i could say goodbye
or make u my
i noe i mean nth to u
and i dunno why
thinkin back onli opens up the wounds
lonely are the days before as am now
nobody stays
everybody goes
leavin me cold inside makin it
a tragedy if u can describe
a thousand lovers wil onli make me cry
cant see anyone with me
wad am i to do
a million times i love u
but u cant hear still

on a nite like this

let me continue dreamin
let me sing this one last song
let me hold on juz a little while more
dun break my dream so fast dun go away

need ur love on a nite like this
someone on a nite like this
i wanna hold u my gal
on a nite like this
such a familiar sight
lyin alone on my bed
ipod my onli companion
i miss u though we last talked juz ago
i noe theres nth to prove to anyone
somehow still wantin to prove myself
many things still left wantin
wan u here
onli u can get me thru the nite
i dun care bout anythin else
nth else matters more
u dunno tat theres someone missin u
u dunno tat theres someone waitin for u
u dunno theres someone needin u
onli when i close my eyes
can i see u
can i get close to u
can i say those words to u
how i wish i could say those words to u
really need ur love
on a nite like this love u

deep within

another lonely nite
another sleepless nite
my frustration no one sees
my pain no one feels
my presence no one cares
the memories playin in my head
the radio playin away
but why do i feel like tearin
a song for this predicament
not too familiar a song
but yet a so familiar voice
a song not too sad
but yet not so happy
its the season of joy
but why aint i gettin some
why aint i feelin some
still alone here
a love tat i dun even dare to say to u
so its obvious tat i had no chance
fallin in and outta love
both at the same time
its onli my fault to blame
i could onli keep u deep within my heart

my name is EDMUND

i dare to wander
i'm not afraid to be lost
i dare to cry
i'm not afraid of sadness
i dare to be special
i'm not afraid of wad people may say
no need for people to noe bout my tears
no need for people to noe about the darkness i went thru
for i no longer need to tink of anyone
before cryin
after sunset
wad is wrong
i dun admit tat i'm wrong
its not tat i dun haf a dream
not tat i nvr tot of turnin back
but turnin back is wrong
takin a step foward oso wrong
so i might as well gif my best in doin wrong
cry if ur tears can gif u an answer
maybe loneliness is scary in ur heart
maybe love will add color to my life
but i'm alone aint it
as long as i'm edmund
i'm not afraid

favourite mistake

i fell in love with a gal i nvr should
but it jus happened
i guess i'm still infatuated with u
can't get u outta my head
maybe u do feel the same too
but my inferior complex sets in
i tink i'm juz not good enuff for u
u're like a goddess
so far and unreachable
i love u but i cant gif u anythin much
u perhaps love me too
but its onli enuff to last juz one song
i got this feelin tat i'm onli livin in his shadow
perhaps me goin to noe u was a mistake rite from the start
but if it is really my biggest mistake
u're my favourite one l
et me be wrong forever
i can see the right of my wrong

stay

i wake up and face the world each day
the feelin in my mind wun go away
i got lost in a game i nvr wanna play
there's lots of things i wish i had the courage to say
but i still dare not and now its way past may
its nearly 1 & 1/2 yrs since tat day
but u're still on my mind everyday
no matter the weather of the day
the tot of u stay
how i wish tat moment could stay
stay anata stay
and tell me u'll nvr go away

cute gal

haf u ever need somebody onli for this nite
why do u keep stealin glances at me
jus come and noe me if u wan
guess u muz be taken
u're busily msgin away
but at least we met cutie
in the late of the nite
though i dunno u gal
but we did met
smile more
u deserve better
u look so beautiful when u smile
like a midnite lover
for it was the time i saw u
on the bus 80
how i wished the ride would nvr end
so tat i could haf all ur attention to myself
like in a world with onli u and me
truly in a world with u i wanna be
ur face keeps appearin in my head
u're all tat i could ever think bout
i feel i could need u for this nite
when all my thoughts are on u
and u're so cute
so wun u come to me
even for this nite
i'll be content
i feel i could really need ur warmth

holdin on to see you go once again

we're onli strangers as i saw the pain hidden in ur eyes
how can i make u forget bout the dreams
its onli heartache when u awake from ur dreams
okie to be lonely
as long as the tears aint fallin
holdin onto each other
onli to seperate
there's no need for reasons when it ends
walkin alone on an unfamilar street
walkin back will perhaps bring back pain
love onli to leave once again
there's no more need to wait for anyone

young and dangerous

different people
different dreams
i'm still dreaming bout my dreams right now
places tat i've never been
things tat i'll never be
but now is not the time to cry
it's the time to find out why
i noe my path ain't easy
but destiny is in my hands
i rather die trying
i haf my own dreams
i'll fly high as long
happiness can be bought with my life
but i can't betray myself
i won't stand aloof and do nothing
as long as i haf the courage to fight my fate
i noe my sufferin will end
i dun care how dangerous it'll be
i'm gonna change this world

juz someone

sing for this kid who dun haf a thing
except for a fuckin dream
for this kid whos been thru shit in his life
sittin down at nite to cry
wishin tat he died


17yrs of life
wasted away his youth
still wastin it by the sec
all the time in the world
all the undone things to do
looked upon on a different light
not wad they wan him to be
was it his fault


someone to hold me tight
as i lay in ur embrace
sleepin snugged like a child
a much deserved rest
ur gentle hands goin thru my hair
gently pattin me on my back
strokin me on the head
assurin the silly me
tats everythin gonna be alrite
ur comfort is all i need
u're the one for me
juz someone

fuck it

hate it every way
hate and pain
both of which are growin
hate and pain
my enemies
and the flowers bloom on the battlefield
for a reason they dunno
hate for every sec
pain for every moment
why can't i even get one sec of happiness
juz one fuckin sec
no respite in my life
life hates me the way it is
i wanna fly but i kept got held back
everytime i wanna break out
i wanna be the things i wanna be
i wanna be someone
i muz be somebody
hook by crook
i no longer care
i juz wan everythin
i wan u
i wan back the things tat were taken away from me
i wan my happiness tat was cruelly taken away back
i wanna make up for all the things i nvr had
i wan this fuckin world under my feet
i wanna stand on top
juz to shout out loud
fuck this world
and all that stand in my way
i dun haf a father like u
u're no kin of mine
so scram
this fuckin world seems to haf no place for me
no where for me to go
no where for me to stay
no where for me anywhere
it juz cant seems to take me in
fuck it

go away

wad am i to u?
is it juz the something of a something?
there's not much for me to say
for it's more than words can express
take my hand
and u can really feel
i'm not a dream
i'm real
i never meant to hurt u
but i noe ur pain is caused by me
i can't keep my promise to u baby
i'm so sorry
i hope u'll understand
pls gif me ur hand
i'll keep u company till the end
i dun ever wanna say goodbye
u can go
for who am i to keep u down
but i only hope tat u stay listen to the sound of my heartbeat
it's been screaming out for u
i can't let u go
i need u to stay baby,
juz gif me one more try
i'll go down on my knees for u
if u muz go,
pls gif me a reason
for there muz be a reason
i've always been a fighter
but without u i gif up
i ain't wad i am
perhaps i'm not tat good anymore
but i'll love u till the end
forever i'll be there for u
i noe even when i die
u'll be on my mind
so many memories tat i haf
some tat made me laugh
some tat made me cry
one tat made u decide to say goodbye

pathetic

feel the pain of the rain
maybe i suxs
dun i
tears flow down
and i dun even noe why
sadness tat's depressin
shut off my mind
killed off the pain
at least tried to
but to no avail
i dunno wad i really wan
if i could relive everythin again
i hate it everynite
the memories juz come and play
times and moments like this
i needed someone near
still lyin on the floor
writin things out
how pathetic
how pathetic
how pathetic

2 strangers

i noe it's stupid
but somehow i'm still hopin
my phone lyin still
forever tat silent
ur disappearance
u disappeared to make me forget
still hopin waitin for the day u appear again
i guess i noe
the tears we dropped
happiness or sadness
maybe my leavin is the best thing to happen

2 unfamilar faces from the start
strangers right from the beginnin
time slowly moved
and feelins crept in
wad kinda feelin is love
we chose usin tears
to be without each other
u stood before the loneliness door
and locked me in
tat was my true feelins for u
but ur heart turned away from me
walkin outta door
to try feelin again for myslef i'll try
i still believe tat forever is not lost
we're already the past tense
writin i love u these 3 words
i could gif up all to say these words again

maybe

special people
special me
perhaps my nothingness
or maybe my helplessness
maybe
tat's wad the word for
still it's better left unsaid
a promise nvr made
always be there
maybe
tat's all i can gif
empty life tat i had lived
can i put it together
maybe
haf a little hope
maybe there'll be more
will this deja vu ever end
waitin for the right kinda angel to come
crimes tat were nvr defined
hanged on the hooks of the stars
hold on
hold on
human affections in a private place
wad a pleasant dream
a ticket to a world i belong
back to back
hangin onto human faith
a journey nvr meant for
maybe
maybe
maybe i dunno at all
but maybe..

crazy sexy marvellous

hold me close
assure me
hold me tighter than before
assure me like nvr before
tat all my fears ain't comin true
tat all my nightmares ain't real
lay me in ur embrace
put me to peace
hold me to sleep
thru the dawn
the antenna on top of the tv
a sight beside the disc
and the hurling being thrown around
wad if tml nvr comes
and the horizons vertical
a hue like sapphire
crazy sexy marvellous
love a tragedy
a way u might describe
all the mixed emotions breakin
hear them cry
the angels fall
when their devotion fades

game

a senseless pain
a senseless life
an empty nite
a shallow fun
a meaningless time
an useless confrontation
an easy way out
still the smell of her lingers in my head
tat wonderfulness of hers
all so intact in my mind
sensous sensation
blows me rite off
i need ur body real close to mine
show me the wonders
tat u hide in u baby
i'm crazy for u tonite
a wonderful nite over in an instant
everythin's gone
and things back as they are
it's juz a game the 2 of us play

i noe

i made a meal
and threw it up on thurs mornin
i really got alot of things to learn
said i would
and i'll be leavin one day
before my heart starts to hurt
and if u're leavin
will u take me with u
i'm tired of sleepin all alone
wad's the matter with me
i juz wanna sing somethin new
cuz i noe
the cold and wind and rain dun go
they onli seem to come and go away
times are hard when things haf got no meanin
i'm watchin tv on my own

i believe in it
i do believe in it
and i still believe in it
as my soul slides away
gonna start a revolution now
to take tat look off from their face
nothin's now gonna put my heart out

they say things will work out rite
they say this is onli temporary
it's not gonna last forever
they say it will be over soon
they say it will they say it definately will
who am i to believe in
so many trains of thoughts goin around
messin up everythin
my world clouded by darkness
livin in this cold dark space
the empty room
the closed door
the closed windows
my onli safe haven
i need a getaway place
i need to getaway
somewhere to hide somewhere
to find my peace
i gotta fight for my peace
how ironic things can be
i gotta abandon my humanity
to take up the rusty sword
all to fight for my peace
my love my hate my angst my pride
all of a seventeen yr old
is this really my fate
perhaps i've been wrong all the while
after all.i've nvr been smart
i nvr had anythin
everythin i stood for were onli lies
in the end i've lost to myself
i've lost to them
i've lost to the world
haf i been wrong all the while
wrong in tryin to fight fate
wrong in tryin to fight my life
wrong tat i nvr admit defeat
even when i'm tired
now then i've know
so tired tat i couldn't sleep
this i sure do noe
i hate this life
i hate the person tat i am now
i tried to overcome my fears
all the possibilities
wad if i ain't wad i really seems
wad if i can't make it at all
wad if...
wad if...
too many ifs in my mind
look at me
take a good look at me
wad do u see
wad did u saw in me
i'll make it different
i'll make the difference
remember my face
i'll fly high
i make sure of tat no matter wad
no matter how
i'll fly higher than anyone has went
i did not gif up hope back then
i nvr did
i nvr will