midnite

inperfect world
blemished
seperations
farewells
pain
agony
loneliness
and tiredness
nobody could ever understand
nobody will ever come into my world
who will hold tight onto my weak hands
why do i cry
why shld i cry
right or wrong doesnt realli matters

broke.broken

turned off the lights
saw myself even more clearly
the wind blowin acorss me
the shadows casted
nothin seems right
gimme my solitude
my onli console
my lonely existence
why shld u care
lyin to myself again
writin them out again
understand the pain
their feelins change once more
hurt me deeply
hurt me to make me forget
dawn comin soon
i'm barely sleepin
lost in my tots
broken home
broken life
broken person

a step foward or back

is leavin the most cruel
or is gentleness tat shld be despised
but a lonely person would not care
theres nothin tat matters to him
is the front really dangerous
or is the back tat is
escapin seems easier
lettin everythin go at one go
a step foward for sadness
a step back for regret
not at peace in this world
stuck and isolated
the place i'm searchin for cant be found
the person i'm waitin for will nvr understand

her fav song

her fav song
i still noe it by my heart
how could i ever forget
when its the song tat keeps playin in my head
i would sing it to u
onli if u let me to
u're so faraway
u could nvr hear


"i will love u till the end of time
every breath of mine i'll hold u by my side
and the best thing is my sweetheart would u
let me die in ur arms with u
onli u can stop the rain tonite
onli u could gif the strength to fight
till the sky is burnin
its the end of time
look ahead tml
a long and windin road
keep the faith of mine
dun let it go
u're the onli reason nite aint growin cold
wad would i do without u"

sing me the blues

gimme my blues
i cant stand this pain
i cant make them go away
i cant forget all the things tat happened to me
my mistakes wun let me run
so sick of my life
holdin onto nothin
can i start all over again
why has this happened
let me fade away
where did it all go wrong

so sick and tired of writin the blues
when will it to be writin somethin else
wads the matter with me
i cant seem to write anythin new
the answers if onli i could noe
maybe then the gloom will go away
i'll write somethin new
time keeps runnin out
maybe i'm scared
maybe i'm lost
had a life but i cant go back
cant do tat

i dun wanna see you

mist tat clouds on the glass
the glass tat seperates me from the world
and the mist blurs my vision
movin along on the streets
so cold on the inside
its pourin on the outside
no where to run
can anyone keep me from the cold

pieces of u still linger
and i tot i've gotten over u
i'm more than afraid of this
i dun wanna see u one more time
cuz i noe i'll fall in love again with u

fallin to pieces
i mean nothin
but would u still prefer me to still be me
the changes or was it coincidence
mistakes so beautiful
one last song
hold me close and dun let me go
i'm weak and crumblin
wanderin aimlessly
i nvr forgotten
standin on the line
one wrong step and i'll fall deep down
the secrets kept deep
livin in my small dark lonely world
the masks i cant take off
how much longer can i hold on
i saw ur eyes
its not me u're thinkin of
the blank listless eyes in the dark
i lost completely
without any pride
too wild for u
too crazy to be serious
too bad for ur likin
a delinquent tat'll nvr make gd in ur eyes
nothin more than an empty shell
there was a time
when i could gif up the whole world for u
i used to
my family dun seem so familiar
my future cant break free of my past
be mine gal
even onli for this nite
i dun care bout the words left unsaid
u're my star tonite

green

walk walk walk
keep on walkin
sleep when u're tired
after which i'll keep walkin away


i stand alone
i walk alone
i sleep alone
i live alone
i'm all alone


does anyone holds for me
does anyone even remember me


this fake world does not need me to be honest
this world full of lies does not need me to be truthful
hide those weakness of mine
nvr let the world noe


seein them so happy together
i could onli see
a tragedy i live
endin before even startin
feelin for people i shldnt be feelin for
feelins tat could onli be kept deep inside
and within it remains


went thru so many
but still so alone
like the lone ranger tat rides out
nvr to be said again
forever a life of solitude


a million lovers in front of me
hands tat held together
they would onli make me green

city people

watched the city from day to dawn
people livin in it without a trace
hidin away even from their shadows
pretendin to be the same
all of them waitin for love
endin up on the wrong side of it
empty for their lives
livin under lies
livin off one another
nvr stoppin to noe who they are
nvr to treasure
onli to feel lonely when they're gone
wishin in the nite for time to go back
dwellin in the past
a fairytale endin is wad they desire
sounds so much like me
guess i'm still empty


little piece of heaven turns to dust
feelin of lovin has all but gone
the sound tat broke thru silence
senseless in itself
nothin in the world is good enuff
like the broken dreams
scattered on the floor in a million pieces
the song in ur heart tat u sing
the one tat onli u noe
singin in ur head
singin in my head
singin forever
listen to ur heart hard
days tat went by
stars hangin on the sky
moon tats in half bloom
shyin away from people's sight
darkness is a feelin
the void in us
none of the feelins in us remain
livin in this world
tryin juz to hold onto anythin
nobody
like u

wastrel

wadeva i do
u're forever not happy with me
why dun u juz leave me alone
dun bother bout me
like u did before
juz let me die if its to wad u said
i'm fine
i'm perfectly normal
juz slacker than the usual
but wads wrong with it
wads ur fuckin problem against me
u juz find me a burden dun u
i'm always a good for nothin in ur eyes
fine tats okie with me
u sure do hate me
but i'm alright with it
u're the same like the others
u're no diff from any of them
when u dun get me
i'm so precious
but when u get
i'm nothin but shit in ur eyes
juz tell me u dislike the look of me
i'm born outta ur now defunct love
i'm an eyesore aint it
i dun need ur acceptance
i dun need ur pity
i dun wan ur attention
i dun wan any of these shit
juz leave me alone
when even i dun care
why the fuckin hell shld u care
my life is for me to waste
its mine
MINE
all mine to waste

missin

all of a sudden
the emptiness tat fills the mind
cloudin over everythin
fallin to sleep seems to be the last thing i could do
my eyes closed
my mind empty juz for one
dreamland now seems like light yrs away
lyin in bed
still feelin so still wonderin
lies tat doesnt hurt
actions tat mean nothin
numb
look into my eyes
its juz not the same anymore


i may love u but its onli enough to sing this song for u
though u make me wanna fall in love
every moment when u're around
its not tat i ignored u intentionally
juz tat i'm not gentle enough
we keep meetin at the wrong time
u're stronger than me
u need no comfortin
but even the best falls down sometimes
at tat moment
i made a promise nvr to hurt u again

dunno how long it has been since i last saw u
i wonder where u are and how are u
all i noe its veri long to me
so long since i last saw ur smile
i really miss it and i mean it
i wish to see it once again
even onli juz one look
juz this once will be enough to make my day
the familiar bus stop yesterday
makes me think of u
are u tired or alone
makes me wanna be next to u to hold u close

mon to sun.

mon mornin i'm all alone
tue mornin i'm on my own
wed thurs its the same
theres still fri sat and sun
3 more days in pain
juz need some affection


why do u cry for me when i fell
when i woke up
the sky is still as dark
one person alone
a flower tat doesnt bloom
it'll nvr wither
the stars above
they shone for me
when ur heart dies
nothin matters
wanderin the seas of sadness
hurt
even a smile seems so forced
but i'm sure tat theres a place
waitin for my dreams to fly
i believe tat happiness is not faraway
even if they go away
nothin can take my dreams away
when they went away
my dreams still stay
theres a place waitin

on a road of no return
the onli way i noe is to go foward
theres no turnin back
theres no 2nd chance
buy me a ticket for the runaway train
travellin on the one way track
the train tats nvr comin back

2nd chance

maybe u hate me
maybe i hate u too
sometimes u love me
sometimes i love u too
and till the day i die
u're in my heart
i'll make the same mistakes
like i always do
u'll turn and walk away
like u always do
u say we'll nvr see eye to eye
heart to heart
will we ever be together
will it be u and me
at the end of this dream
dun need to cry
onli haf to believe in it
maybe we're waitin for a second chance
to make things rite
we're so the same
we could need each other thru the nite
paper heart
one touch and it'll be torn time
juz cant be turned back
i'll run all the way around the world
if i could run back in time
day by day
goin further away from u
will u think of me
feel tat i'm missin u
love ya

rainbow to the earth

changin world
changin times
everybody is changin
and i dunno why
so outta touch
unable to understand this life
the pain tat shows in ur eyes
those red swollen eyes
they speak for themselves
doors tat were opened.closed
faces tat smiled no longer do
nothin will hurt
turned away
walk the steps to faraway
to the place where the earth meets the rainbow
somewhere they'll be together forever
sit under the apple tree
watch the stars at nite
too many wrongs done in this life
too little to make it right
the flashbacks tat appears
times u broke down in front of the mirror
hope tat gets complicated
not tat i dun wanna believe
but the faith tat i lack
let the sleepless me be in ur dreams
wad do u see in my eyes
why do i feel so much like dead ends

2/14

time of the year again
once more i'm lyin here
alone in my own world
alone in this small space
writin to myself as usual
tryin to comfort myself
i wonder can i still make it on my own
i tried to open the door
wishin myself to be next to u
will u fall in love with me
if i sing tat song with all my heart
will u gif me one min of ur time
let me take a deep look at u
let me remember u
tat sweetest momemt of u will stay in my heart
but we're onli frens
i guess there'll nvr be me in ur heart
missin thinkin of u
onli leaves me with big eye bags
i wonder how long before i could say goodbye
or make u my
i noe i mean nth to u
and i dunno why
thinkin back onli opens up the wounds
lonely are the days before as am now
nobody stays
everybody goes
leavin me cold inside makin it
a tragedy if u can describe
a thousand lovers wil onli make me cry
cant see anyone with me
wad am i to do
a million times i love u
but u cant hear still

on a nite like this

let me continue dreamin
let me sing this one last song
let me hold on juz a little while more
dun break my dream so fast dun go away

need ur love on a nite like this
someone on a nite like this
i wanna hold u my gal
on a nite like this
such a familiar sight
lyin alone on my bed
ipod my onli companion
i miss u though we last talked juz ago
i noe theres nth to prove to anyone
somehow still wantin to prove myself
many things still left wantin
wan u here
onli u can get me thru the nite
i dun care bout anythin else
nth else matters more
u dunno tat theres someone missin u
u dunno tat theres someone waitin for u
u dunno theres someone needin u
onli when i close my eyes
can i see u
can i get close to u
can i say those words to u
how i wish i could say those words to u
really need ur love
on a nite like this love u

deep within

another lonely nite
another sleepless nite
my frustration no one sees
my pain no one feels
my presence no one cares
the memories playin in my head
the radio playin away
but why do i feel like tearin
a song for this predicament
not too familiar a song
but yet a so familiar voice
a song not too sad
but yet not so happy
its the season of joy
but why aint i gettin some
why aint i feelin some
still alone here
a love tat i dun even dare to say to u
so its obvious tat i had no chance
fallin in and outta love
both at the same time
its onli my fault to blame
i could onli keep u deep within my heart

my name is EDMUND

i dare to wander
i'm not afraid to be lost
i dare to cry
i'm not afraid of sadness
i dare to be special
i'm not afraid of wad people may say
no need for people to noe bout my tears
no need for people to noe about the darkness i went thru
for i no longer need to tink of anyone
before cryin
after sunset
wad is wrong
i dun admit tat i'm wrong
its not tat i dun haf a dream
not tat i nvr tot of turnin back
but turnin back is wrong
takin a step foward oso wrong
so i might as well gif my best in doin wrong
cry if ur tears can gif u an answer
maybe loneliness is scary in ur heart
maybe love will add color to my life
but i'm alone aint it
as long as i'm edmund
i'm not afraid

favourite mistake

i fell in love with a gal i nvr should
but it jus happened
i guess i'm still infatuated with u
can't get u outta my head
maybe u do feel the same too
but my inferior complex sets in
i tink i'm juz not good enuff for u
u're like a goddess
so far and unreachable
i love u but i cant gif u anythin much
u perhaps love me too
but its onli enuff to last juz one song
i got this feelin tat i'm onli livin in his shadow
perhaps me goin to noe u was a mistake rite from the start
but if it is really my biggest mistake
u're my favourite one l
et me be wrong forever
i can see the right of my wrong

stay

i wake up and face the world each day
the feelin in my mind wun go away
i got lost in a game i nvr wanna play
there's lots of things i wish i had the courage to say
but i still dare not and now its way past may
its nearly 1 & 1/2 yrs since tat day
but u're still on my mind everyday
no matter the weather of the day
the tot of u stay
how i wish tat moment could stay
stay anata stay
and tell me u'll nvr go away

cute gal

haf u ever need somebody onli for this nite
why do u keep stealin glances at me
jus come and noe me if u wan
guess u muz be taken
u're busily msgin away
but at least we met cutie
in the late of the nite
though i dunno u gal
but we did met
smile more
u deserve better
u look so beautiful when u smile
like a midnite lover
for it was the time i saw u
on the bus 80
how i wished the ride would nvr end
so tat i could haf all ur attention to myself
like in a world with onli u and me
truly in a world with u i wanna be
ur face keeps appearin in my head
u're all tat i could ever think bout
i feel i could need u for this nite
when all my thoughts are on u
and u're so cute
so wun u come to me
even for this nite
i'll be content
i feel i could really need ur warmth

holdin on to see you go once again

we're onli strangers as i saw the pain hidden in ur eyes
how can i make u forget bout the dreams
its onli heartache when u awake from ur dreams
okie to be lonely
as long as the tears aint fallin
holdin onto each other
onli to seperate
there's no need for reasons when it ends
walkin alone on an unfamilar street
walkin back will perhaps bring back pain
love onli to leave once again
there's no more need to wait for anyone

young and dangerous

different people
different dreams
i'm still dreaming bout my dreams right now
places tat i've never been
things tat i'll never be
but now is not the time to cry
it's the time to find out why
i noe my path ain't easy
but destiny is in my hands
i rather die trying
i haf my own dreams
i'll fly high as long
happiness can be bought with my life
but i can't betray myself
i won't stand aloof and do nothing
as long as i haf the courage to fight my fate
i noe my sufferin will end
i dun care how dangerous it'll be
i'm gonna change this world

juz someone

sing for this kid who dun haf a thing
except for a fuckin dream
for this kid whos been thru shit in his life
sittin down at nite to cry
wishin tat he died


17yrs of life
wasted away his youth
still wastin it by the sec
all the time in the world
all the undone things to do
looked upon on a different light
not wad they wan him to be
was it his fault


someone to hold me tight
as i lay in ur embrace
sleepin snugged like a child
a much deserved rest
ur gentle hands goin thru my hair
gently pattin me on my back
strokin me on the head
assurin the silly me
tats everythin gonna be alrite
ur comfort is all i need
u're the one for me
juz someone

fuck it

hate it every way
hate and pain
both of which are growin
hate and pain
my enemies
and the flowers bloom on the battlefield
for a reason they dunno
hate for every sec
pain for every moment
why can't i even get one sec of happiness
juz one fuckin sec
no respite in my life
life hates me the way it is
i wanna fly but i kept got held back
everytime i wanna break out
i wanna be the things i wanna be
i wanna be someone
i muz be somebody
hook by crook
i no longer care
i juz wan everythin
i wan u
i wan back the things tat were taken away from me
i wan my happiness tat was cruelly taken away back
i wanna make up for all the things i nvr had
i wan this fuckin world under my feet
i wanna stand on top
juz to shout out loud
fuck this world
and all that stand in my way
i dun haf a father like u
u're no kin of mine
so scram
this fuckin world seems to haf no place for me
no where for me to go
no where for me to stay
no where for me anywhere
it juz cant seems to take me in
fuck it

go away

wad am i to u?
is it juz the something of a something?
there's not much for me to say
for it's more than words can express
take my hand
and u can really feel
i'm not a dream
i'm real
i never meant to hurt u
but i noe ur pain is caused by me
i can't keep my promise to u baby
i'm so sorry
i hope u'll understand
pls gif me ur hand
i'll keep u company till the end
i dun ever wanna say goodbye
u can go
for who am i to keep u down
but i only hope tat u stay listen to the sound of my heartbeat
it's been screaming out for u
i can't let u go
i need u to stay baby,
juz gif me one more try
i'll go down on my knees for u
if u muz go,
pls gif me a reason
for there muz be a reason
i've always been a fighter
but without u i gif up
i ain't wad i am
perhaps i'm not tat good anymore
but i'll love u till the end
forever i'll be there for u
i noe even when i die
u'll be on my mind
so many memories tat i haf
some tat made me laugh
some tat made me cry
one tat made u decide to say goodbye

pathetic

feel the pain of the rain
maybe i suxs
dun i
tears flow down
and i dun even noe why
sadness tat's depressin
shut off my mind
killed off the pain
at least tried to
but to no avail
i dunno wad i really wan
if i could relive everythin again
i hate it everynite
the memories juz come and play
times and moments like this
i needed someone near
still lyin on the floor
writin things out
how pathetic
how pathetic
how pathetic

2 strangers

i noe it's stupid
but somehow i'm still hopin
my phone lyin still
forever tat silent
ur disappearance
u disappeared to make me forget
still hopin waitin for the day u appear again
i guess i noe
the tears we dropped
happiness or sadness
maybe my leavin is the best thing to happen

2 unfamilar faces from the start
strangers right from the beginnin
time slowly moved
and feelins crept in
wad kinda feelin is love
we chose usin tears
to be without each other
u stood before the loneliness door
and locked me in
tat was my true feelins for u
but ur heart turned away from me
walkin outta door
to try feelin again for myslef i'll try
i still believe tat forever is not lost
we're already the past tense
writin i love u these 3 words
i could gif up all to say these words again

maybe

special people
special me
perhaps my nothingness
or maybe my helplessness
maybe
tat's wad the word for
still it's better left unsaid
a promise nvr made
always be there
maybe
tat's all i can gif
empty life tat i had lived
can i put it together
maybe
haf a little hope
maybe there'll be more
will this deja vu ever end
waitin for the right kinda angel to come
crimes tat were nvr defined
hanged on the hooks of the stars
hold on
hold on
human affections in a private place
wad a pleasant dream
a ticket to a world i belong
back to back
hangin onto human faith
a journey nvr meant for
maybe
maybe
maybe i dunno at all
but maybe..

crazy sexy marvellous

hold me close
assure me
hold me tighter than before
assure me like nvr before
tat all my fears ain't comin true
tat all my nightmares ain't real
lay me in ur embrace
put me to peace
hold me to sleep
thru the dawn
the antenna on top of the tv
a sight beside the disc
and the hurling being thrown around
wad if tml nvr comes
and the horizons vertical
a hue like sapphire
crazy sexy marvellous
love a tragedy
a way u might describe
all the mixed emotions breakin
hear them cry
the angels fall
when their devotion fades

game

a senseless pain
a senseless life
an empty nite
a shallow fun
a meaningless time
an useless confrontation
an easy way out
still the smell of her lingers in my head
tat wonderfulness of hers
all so intact in my mind
sensous sensation
blows me rite off
i need ur body real close to mine
show me the wonders
tat u hide in u baby
i'm crazy for u tonite
a wonderful nite over in an instant
everythin's gone
and things back as they are
it's juz a game the 2 of us play

i noe

i made a meal
and threw it up on thurs mornin
i really got alot of things to learn
said i would
and i'll be leavin one day
before my heart starts to hurt
and if u're leavin
will u take me with u
i'm tired of sleepin all alone
wad's the matter with me
i juz wanna sing somethin new
cuz i noe
the cold and wind and rain dun go
they onli seem to come and go away
times are hard when things haf got no meanin
i'm watchin tv on my own

i believe in it
i do believe in it
and i still believe in it
as my soul slides away
gonna start a revolution now
to take tat look off from their face
nothin's now gonna put my heart out

they say things will work out rite
they say this is onli temporary
it's not gonna last forever
they say it will be over soon
they say it will they say it definately will
who am i to believe in
so many trains of thoughts goin around
messin up everythin
my world clouded by darkness
livin in this cold dark space
the empty room
the closed door
the closed windows
my onli safe haven
i need a getaway place
i need to getaway
somewhere to hide somewhere
to find my peace
i gotta fight for my peace
how ironic things can be
i gotta abandon my humanity
to take up the rusty sword
all to fight for my peace
my love my hate my angst my pride
all of a seventeen yr old
is this really my fate
perhaps i've been wrong all the while
after all.i've nvr been smart
i nvr had anythin
everythin i stood for were onli lies
in the end i've lost to myself
i've lost to them
i've lost to the world
haf i been wrong all the while
wrong in tryin to fight fate
wrong in tryin to fight my life
wrong tat i nvr admit defeat
even when i'm tired
now then i've know
so tired tat i couldn't sleep
this i sure do noe
i hate this life
i hate the person tat i am now
i tried to overcome my fears
all the possibilities
wad if i ain't wad i really seems
wad if i can't make it at all
wad if...
wad if...
too many ifs in my mind
look at me
take a good look at me
wad do u see
wad did u saw in me
i'll make it different
i'll make the difference
remember my face
i'll fly high
i make sure of tat no matter wad
no matter how
i'll fly higher than anyone has went
i did not gif up hope back then
i nvr did
i nvr will

anyone will do

listen to the sound of my lonely heart
still thinkin bout the past
how things used to be
tryin hard to live alone
day by day
everythin juz comes to me when i'm lyin in my bed
late at nite i struggled alone
right now onli memories are left
how i need a different place to hide
it really seems to me
tat there's no light at the end of darkness
all the things can nvr be the same again
can things ever work out rite
always disappointed at the end of everythin
everytime i tried hard
i put my heart into everythin i do
wad did i get back in return
and there's no one round to hold my hand
anyone would do
juz pls.someone
lay me to sleep comfort me like the kid i am
i need to noe again the feelin of secure
it's so hard to make it on my own
even harder when everyone tryin to make a fool outta me
makin me out to be a clown to them
juz to entertain them
fuck them all
everybody juz likes to mess me up
fuck them all

fly boy

this small crazy boy
wans to fly
away from this place
he's walkin on the road alone
travellin strollin wanderin along
on the long dusty windy road
he wans to see the sights
tat he couldn't but in his dreams
the lights tat lit the way are blindin
there are many things tat he would like to noe
but he dunno how
but maybe
he'll be able to make it someday
cuz maybe
he'll noe how to make it
and after all
he's onli seventeen
in this place he found no reason to stay
with the colors slowly fadin away
he wans to smile
he wans to laugh
and he wans to fly

special

okie this one special
requested by laoda
here goes...
4.30am in the mornin...
2guys stopped their mitsubishi galant in front of where i was sittin(on a fountain)
they got off their car and walked towards me
i took a look at them
one of them stared at me
i was thinkin "are they lookin for a fight???"
then suddenely let's call him guy 1
guy 1:police
me: *thinkin*(are u sure?)
guy1:ic pls
me: okie
guy2:how come so late still dun wan go home
guy2 then woke laoda who was sleepin on the chair up
laoda was blur blur
guy1:ic pls
me and laoda then handed over my ic and laoda ez link
guy 2:wad's ur address
laoda:wan send letter ar???
laoda still blur dunno wad's goin on
guy 2 i think oso blur blur nvr heard wad laoda was sayin
laoda then finally woke up said his add
guy1:how come so late still dun wan go home
me:come out to talk talk lor
guy 1 then went off on his walkie talkie
guy 1came back
guy1:got record anot
me:nope
guy 2 then handed back our ic
they then went off

the kindness endowed upon

unknowingly a yr has past
it all seems so long ago
and i grown used to this shit
peace or pity
i dun care
it's none of my business
they say i'm crazy
i am crazy
i'm not really ok
but it doesn't matter to me at all
it's not my past
and it's nvr gonna bother me
regrets i'm without any
the truth hit me long ago
somehow i'm still emotional
attached to the kindness of an older generation
if not for it
i would haf break away long ago
it's the onli thing tat keeps me here
i juz dun haf the heart to turn away
it's etched deep within my heart
the kindness endowed upon

tears devoured me

in the lonely hrs
the tears juz devoured me
and i can't deceive it
cuz even when i close my eyes
it's still so clear to me
under the stars on the black dark sky
and even any fool can see i'm fallin
but i juz dun understand
this i swear
sometimes i feel
all my dreams haf seen better days
but somehow now
i felt i've lost my way
and there's no light here to guide me
and no one to walk beside to
and the sky so dark and stormy
there's no one reachin out for me
there's no one i can go to
no one i can go to

everyday everynite

sleepless at nite
for who or wad
walkin along life
on a cold lonely nite
a long and windin road
i can onli hear my breathin
for every nite there is
my eyes wide open till dawn
my heart so empty
a pain tat no one understands
for every day there is
i always dun get to see u
till the sky turns dark
sadness tat blurs my vision
sleepin alone tryin to kill the pain
hopin to find salvation
for everyday and every nite

i dun wanna miss u
cuz i wanna be with u always
i dun ask for the world
juz some time together with u
i wanna feel u close
i need u close
i dun wan anythin else but u
i dun need anyone else but u
i'm on an addiction
keeps me cravin for more
i juz need u so much

simply amazin

charmin?
perhaps so
essential?
maybe so
from the eyes of another
i saw myself
so many faces to me
they say i'm like a mystery
a deep story behind it
had a hard time comin thru
and i thk u
for u're the man
u're one of the best
simply amazin

fuck it all
fuck them all
damm it all
fuckin damm it all
to hell with it
to fuckin hell with it all

stay gold

livin on the streets
he hated his father
all he wans is some sweet human affections
his heart ceased to beat
doesn't feel complete
there's no more objection

livin on his own
he's tired of this unhappy life
got so disappointed in suprises
why does he feel
how muz he act

livin out alone
not satisfied with juz this
who can he believe in
an emotion blackhole
juz suxs everythin in

in his mind he's still a child
forced to grow up at this age
had no choice but to do so
forced by circumstances

still like a lost kid
lookin out for directions
and he dreamt bout a dream
in it
the most beautiful sight

it's so hard to stay gold
in the world so tainted
but stay gold boy
stay

bored

there's always someone livin alone
there's always someone leavin alone
they dun care wad the people may say
they dun mind wad they see
pick it up
and put it down
choose it urself
many stories he had to tell
many dreams he like to sell
many words he wanna yell
but in the end
he still fell
there's nobody like they fade away

so hard to be a nice guy

it's the moments we shared
it's the fun we had
it's the times we haf
it's wad we both missed
but still we remain the same
dreamers as we are
dreams beyond the wildest dream
and no
we ain't bad
dun look at us tat way
we're onli seventeen

so hard to be a nice guy
harder when the cat dun acknowledges it
but still we are
the nice guys tat we always are

i'm shallow

lookin back
on my memories
on my past
for the 17yrs i walked
i feel so cheap rite now
found myself so haggard in front of the mirror
onli for me to break it
tat shld not be me
i used to be wad people wished to be
i used to be wad they envy
i was everythin beyond their reach
wad on earth haf i become now
facin the allurin temptation
i felt tat i could take the easy way out
givin up
wad had happened
where's the arrogance
where's the cockiness
where's the coolness
wad the hell had happened
things seem beyond my control
i became silent
silence around the air
helplessness spinnin around me
loneliness flowin in the nite
time keeps goin on
clingin onto wadever i can
felt so empty chasin after everythin
tryin so hard to keep everythin
but it's all fultile
lots of things haf lost their meanin
many new haf gained
reminscin still bout the past
too much sorrow
too little love
too much loneliness
too little care
too much sadness
too little happiness
keep blabberin on
and i seem so shallow

i wan u

in this city
i somehow found love in u
i nvr tot i could be in love again
till the day i met u

u taught me everythin
u made me believe in it

u took me for wad i am
u dun mind the fact of who i am
u juz took me as me
nvr wantin me to change in any ways

i wanna hold u
nvr to let u go
hold ur hand
walkin down the road with u
gaze at the stars at nite
under the beautiful nite sky

u went right thru
and touched my heart
u opened up my mind
and mend the pieces
u made me wanna fall in love again

i wanna love u till the end of time

neglected.forgotten

holdin on desperately onto the pieces of my life
tryin hard to hold them together
tryin to make some sense outta this
others noe u better than i do
u spend more time with others than with me
i'm neglected here
forgotten in the dark corner
or was i even on ur mind
onli when i dun bother to care
then will u find me important
why muz u be like this

till then i realised
i knew so little bout u
lots of things i nvr noe
i onli met u then
even now i still dunno
wadever it is
all so little
i nvr was in ur world
i'm insignificant to u
all the while
all along
u do not notice if i'm not here
u do not miss me if i'm not around
i guess i still wander alone
wadever it is
i shut myself out to the world
oblivious to anythin else
i closed my heart
the disappointment of expectation
dropped to the ground
sympathy so pathetic
u dunno the meanin of being lonely
u dunno the feelin of being neglected
drowned myself out
u'll still nvr noe

i'm shallow
my feelins so shallow
my life so hollow
and i noe
i can nvr be part of ur life
and u'll nvr gif up anythin for me
even though u say u would
so why am i thinkin so much
askin u to gif up anythin
simply too much to ask for
all i wan is a star tat shine onli for me
i'm selfish i noe
but who ain't
love is all i ever wan
is tat too much to ask
i guess it will nvr be
such things juz ain't to be
hope tat brings onli disappointment
tired of talkin
i've given up hope
totally without any
i dun wish to speak anymore
for u dun wanna hear any of this
i washed my hands clean off this shit
dun bother me bout such stuff
i nvr wish to be embroiled
it makes no sense
dun come complainin to me anymore
i dun wish to care
so little time
so much to do
yet u rather spend time with others than with me
u said goodbye too many times before
u changed so much
or maybe i nvr knew u at all

i've lost my place

the dawn is onli hrs away
the place still filled with darkness
i'm lyin on my bed
devoured by the loneliness at nite
the onli color in my life
nth much in my head
juz the same old stuborness
refusin to close my eyes
but even the best fall down sometimes
and when the stars refuse to shine
my world juz collides with emptiness
and when time stops here
i've lost my place
i'm far behind
and all the doubts tat fill my mind
i somehow find i'm still feelin blue

maybe words can't express my feelins anymore
my nightmares all seem comin true
there's no control
emotions juz flow
distort the truth of reality
livin in lies
it's all my fault
i dun haf a thing
except for a dream
no one can take my tml away

juz me

all of a sudden feelin so empty
everyone seems to disappear without a trace
and i dunno why
the loneliness so allurin
and i grown to like the nite
the beauty of darkness
it nvr fails to impress me
and the rhythm of the nite
became the feelin of my life
the heartbeat of mine
all so audible in the silence of the nite
right in the middle of the city
i juz can't fight life
and i juz can't win
i nvr wanna compete with anyone
never wish to
so wad if i win
so wad if i lose
are u happy? i dun wanna be someone tat i'm not
do wad i dun wanna do
pretend to be wad i'm supposed to be
i juz wanna be me